When Valentine’s Arrow Has Missed the Mark


All this talk about love and romance may bring out the warm and fuzzies in the hearts of many, but it leaves a whopping 95,700,000 in the cold. Divorced, widowed, never been married and even those who are now in a relationship comprise this vast number of single adults.

Valentine’s Day may be the Holiday of Love, but not everyone has reason to celebrate. For some, they’ll find the empty chair at the dinner table an unbearable reminder of a broken marriage and a broken heart. Others will sit silently at their favorite restaurant grieving the loss of the love of their life. Many will gather with family and friends dodging the relentless and patronizingly uncomfortable question, “So, when are you gonna get married?”

Today’s guest blogger candidly shares her heart as she allows us to look at Valentine’s Day through the eyes of singleness. Rose’s story may just change the way you think about the value of love and marriage.

Once again, the holiday of ‘romance’ rolls around and once again there will be no notes, no cards, no flowers. Now, I am not complaining about this season in my life as I know that God has a plan and it is all in His timing, but it did get me thinking of how we can sometimes lose our focus on what love is all about.

There has been a time or two when I have had friends who confided how they had seriously been contemplating leaving their husband (and I am talking women who know the Lord). Their reasons for wanting out are not for the grossly abusive situations one would hope God would understand, but for the same vague reasons of dissatisfaction given for the dissolution of so many worldly relationships.

Being someone who has been divorced for nine years now, I offer a view from the ‘other side’ as food for thought. God was so good to me and saved me soon after my divorce when I was at a very low point. I am thankful for that and have grown more and more every day and every year since then. But one thing has not happened. I still spend Valentine’s alone.

As much as I would love things to be different, it has obviously not been in God’s plan for me right now. I don’t plan on going out and finding myself a man on my own? No. Not going to make that mistake again.

When my friends ask me about leaving their husbands, I just ask them, “Are you are willing to live with the consequences of your disobedience to God if you choose what you think you want right now? Or are you willing to give the Godly relationship you have now a chance with unconditional love, that same love that He has shown you?”

I would think the choice would be obvious.

I shared Rose’s story because I believe it may help those who are walking through a difficult season in their marriage. Perhaps they could filter their decisions through Rosie’s questions and consider the consequences before things go too far.

What about you? Do you know someone who’s considering divorce? Are you? I’d count it an honor to pray for you if you are struggling in your marriage?

Maybe you’d like to share your story or some words of wisdom that can encourage those who are barely holding on by a thread. I’d love to hear from you.

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