As I casually strolled into the bookstore, scanning the newly inventoried shelves, I was ready to place my order when Kaye looked at me with a whimsical grin on her face and cheerfully announced, “I bought your book.” I had no clue what she was talking about. I hadn’t even received the first edit yet…how could she have bought my book? My mind began racing, “Oh please tell me they didn’t publish it without editing it. How could that be?” I was momentarily in a state of panicked confusion.
Kaye quickly put me out of my misery as she took me back to her office, slid a catalog out of her files and pointed at a book on top right hand corner. There it was, Ecclesiastes: Understanding What Matters Most by Stephanie Shott. I couldn’t believe it. My book was already in AMG’s catalog! Since I’m a newbie to the writing and publishing world, I had no idea publishers promote several months in advance of production.
After jumping up and down like a giddy little school girl, I couldn’t help but reflect on the goodness of God. My excitement wasn’t really because my name was found on the bottom of a book, but because I felt as though the Lord had just given me a big hug of confirmation. He certainly does exceedingly, abundantly above all we ask or think!
Later, I found my book was available on Amazon for pre-orders. Amazing! I never really knew why I was writing it and now I’m looking at it on Amazon. Honestly, the way the Lord brought all the pieces of the puzzle together to land this book on the bookshelves, I believe, with all my heart, He will use it to minister to others for His glory. Wow! That’s all I want my life to be about…to know Him and to make Him known!
That’s the good news.
My emotions quickly took a nosedive when I found out my birthmom has an aggressive form of breast cancer that has spread more quickly than they had originally thought. It’s in her breast, lymph nodes, ribs and pelvis. They begin administering a very strong dose of chemo today in hopes of attacking her stage four cancer.
Then, there’s my mom whose lung cancer has spread to her adrenal glands and her ribs. She weighs about 110 lbs. She may have lost weight, but she hasn’t lost an ounce of spunk. It’s sad to know that unless the Lord chooses to heal her, she probably won’t make it to her 77th birthday in July.
How is it possible that my birthmom is now traveling down the same road my mom has been on for the past several years. I love them both dearly and my heart breaks for them. I realize I’m a blessed woman to have the love of two wonderful mothers. One who loved me enough to raise me as her own and the other who would look past the pain of rape and choose life for me instead. So, watching them walk through such a painful process at the same time is doubly difficult for me.
So, somebody pinch me. Can it be true that my book is finally making its way to the shelves? Oh God, You are so awesome! You fulfill Your work in us. You establish and confirm the works of our hands. You really do exceedingly, abundantly above all we can ask or think! I trust You.
So, somebody pinch me. Can it be true that both my moms are suffering from cancer? Oh, God, You are still so awesome! Your grace is sufficient. Your peace beyond understanding. Your love never fails. Your mercy is new each morning. You are forever good. You are forever God! I trust You.