The Making of a Marriage – Honor

As we walk through this marriage series together and connect the dots of what a good marriage is made of, we can’t forget to draw a very important line from serving to honoring.

To honor means to respect or to esteem highly. Easy when a man is leading well, loving well and acting like Prince Charming. Not so easy when he has spent money your family doesn’t have, has just been fired from his fifth job in a year, just pierced your heart with his words or you just discovered his internet habits have taken him to sites he shouldn’t have been.

But there are no escape clauses in the Word of God. When we read verses like Ephesians 5:33, we find we are called to respect our husbands with no strings attached. 

Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” Ephesians 5:33 (NKJV)

I remember years ago when my amazing husband and I had just had an all out battle of the minds and it wasn’t pretty. I didn’t agree with him and he didn’t agree with me and we were not budging. Neither of us.

We ended up heading in the direction he chose but I was definitely not a happy camper. I was mad and I wanted to stay that way. I justified my bad attitude and the tension in our home was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

And then the conviction became more than I could bear and as I pondered the path of my heart I realized that I had not been honoring my husband. 

Not only was my initial reaction ridiculously petty, but the way I continued to carry my constant disapproving demeanor into our every conversation only proved that I was not honoring my man.

Biblically speaking, honoring is not conditional. It’s a command.

When it comes to your hubby’s heart and your relationship with him… it’s necessary.

When a man receives respect from his wife, it makes him want to live up to it. 

In a woman’s mind, respect and honor are interchangeable but in a man’s mind, it’s respect and love that are interchangeable. 

Honor is not always deserved but that doesn’t excuse us from God’s higher calling to honor our husbands.

Today, write out five ways you can show your husband you honor him and them let the honoring begin! You’ll be amazed at how he responds!

What can you do today to start honoring your man?


  1. Heather Nelson

    I heard Beth Moore say that submission is kind of like choosing to “duck” underneath, so that when the Mighty arm of GOD swings, he gets bopped and not you. haha. Not the most Holy motivation, but helps me somehow. Thanks Stephanie, This is SO good!! Please keep it up!!

  2. Thanks Stephanie, Great Post and so true.
    Heather, I will certainly remember that. 😉

  3. Heather,

    I LOVE that! Not the best motivation, but I remember years ago when it finally occurred to me that submission comes with a lot less accountability. He has to answer to the Lord for how he leads… I just have to submit and pray. 🙂

  4. Kris,

    Thanks for the sweet words! You're such a blessing, my friend! 🙂

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