A religious farmer lost his Bible out in the field.
A few days later he went to answer a noise at his door. Standing there was a cow, with his Bible in its mouth!
The farmer raised his eyes to heaven and thanked the Lord for this miracle.
“Not really,” said the cow. “Your name was written inside.”
SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT
Is there another word for synonym?
It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.
It’s hard to be nostalgic when you can’t remember anything.
It was a brave man who ate the first oyster.
THE NEW BOYFRIEND
A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. They were a bit concerned that he appeared to be a thug.
Later, the girl’s mom says, “Dear, he doesn’t seem to be a very nice boy.” “Oh, please, Mom!” says the daughter. “If he wasn’t nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?”
A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
“Listen,” said the CEO, “this is a very sensitive and important document here, and my secretary has gone for the night. Can you make this thing work?”
“Certainly,” said the young executive.
He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
“Excellent, excellent!” said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the machine. “I just need one copy.”